With Bacon In It?!

Things To Do:

Make the best eight hour playlist known to mankind.
Finish my knitting project.
Get The Bitchin' Book Club started!

I cried in the car on my way home from work today. Memories...

I've started a hope chest for when I move out of the house. Well, it's not so much a chest as some garbage bags in the back of my closet, but the sentiment is there. So far I have towels and a blender.. that's all you need for basic survival, right?

I'm birdsitting my neighbour's parrot and I hate it. I feel so bad for the poor caged thing. It's my age and it's never known anything but the inside of that house. I just feel having a bird as a pet is inhumane. You have aerodynamic wings that are awesome and can make you fly?! Get in the cage.

I continue to hate pretentious people.

I spent two and a half hours on personal phone calls at work today. On top of that I did about sixteen sudoku and one word jumble. Needless to say, I had a very productive day improving my brain age. Also there was a blindingly beautiful snowstorm.

FERFTO. Anyone?

Baby Come Home With Me.

On Wednesday I took my beautiful glasses in to have the lenses checked out because I've been getting headaches. The woman took my glasses away and that was the last I saw of them. SHE BROKE THEM IN HALF. The new piece is coming in about a week's time, so until then I have this HORRIBLE pair of loaner glasses. They are wire frames, which I haven't had in about five years and they make me look uber bland. I'm staying indoors.

Per my staying indoors rule, I've been having a pleasant morning, sleeping in and moping around my house. I woke up, ate some chocolate covered peanuts and now I'm listening to some Kathleen Edwards, which is rocking. When I first listened to her stuff I listened too much and wore her out. She's coming around again. Yay.

My dogs were being cute this morning. Well, the one was. The other one was sucking on his bone like an alcoholic. A bone-aholic if you will.

His Mouth Is Open

And he keeps drooling.
He keeps, keeps drooling.

Just got back from the longest road trip of my life. Seven hours alone in a car is plenty.

Calgary Highlights:
1. The Food Network.
2. The cutest little dog ever. Anti-highlight: When it pooped in Clair's room and she wouldn't talk to it for days.
3. Sweet vintage dresses on the cheap.
4. H&M, Baby.
5. Faceless Arcade in all of its many forms.
6. William Shatner presents Rock Band.
7. Breakfast at Nellie's on 17th.
8. When a cute boy walked past our car and we both looked at each other simultaneously. I should clarify that "we" was Clair and I.
9. When we were in Value Village and Clair was dancing around in the change room.
10. The Science Centre. In all of its crazy glory. My favorite part was when we left, but still it was fun.
11. Drives. In Regina, it only takes a few minutes to get anywhere so you never really get into a CD or car banter before you're where you need to be. I like that it takes a while to get places in Calgary.
12. Sister-wives. Kate french braided our hair and we looked like polygamy sister-wives.

Pretty Faces In The Shade.

I'm listening to Phantom of the Opera and having the hugest urge to pull an all nighter watching it. I love Phantom! Not so much when he's wearing a red onesie leotard. Also, what's with Gerard Butler being in movies with lame leading ladies. Katherine Heigl, Hilary Swank.. you're better than this Gerard!

I love being twenty so much! I was thinking about it today. Remember when we couldn't get into shows we wanted to see? Or always having to check in with your parents. Being twenty is like having your own car. Freedom, baby. Also, you look hotter than you've ever looked. It just happens. Not to say I'm a babe or anything, but I definitely look better than I did two or three years ago. Weird thoughts.

For about ten minutes when I got home today I was infinitely sad. It was something Kristy said the other day about how she was really close with someone and not knowing if she would ever see them again because they were dead set on never coming home. It's a stupid thought, but it just made me home sick for a year ago when everything was nice and everyone was together and friendly.

This blog has no direction. Again. Wish me luck with the roads on Thursday!I don't know why my dog always chooses my room to have seizures in, but he does. Tell tale sign? My pillowcase is covered in SO MUCH drool. Eight ounces of DoDro*. That's a hell of a lot of DoDro.

*Dog Drool.

Tequila Sunrise on a Monday Morning.

Yesterday I went over to Kristy's house and we drank pretty much all afternoon. Not extreme amounts or anything, just sat in her hot tub drinking tropical drinks. We tried out a couple of new recipes, shared some chicken nuggets or "nugs" as we affectionately call them, listened to some tunes and then the tequila came out. We each did three shots and each shot just progressively got worse.

We decided to go to Bonzinni's because it was perogie night (!) so we drunkenly stumbled down the street to get there. Fran intercepted us about halfway there. When she opened the door to her car, Indian music spilled out onto the street. She explained that she had burned the Slumdog Millionaire soundtrack, but not all of the tracks worked so she was listening to this one on repeat. When we got to Bonzinni's (!) they were closed. LAME! We all had our hearts set on perogies, so we went to our favorite pub and had perogie pizza instead.

Trivia started and there was a poetry contest. We wrote a dirty limerick and won a pizza! It was all very exciting. Poor Julian didn't come this week. The one week that we actually win something. Also, there were a lot of sports related questions that he could've helped us out on.

Talk about a hangover on a Monday morning. Shelly in accounting and I were both pretty bad off this morning. We met up at the coffee machine, looked at each other, laughed, and then held our heads and grimaced. It was so funny.

I'm freaking out about my trip to Calgary. I'm stoked! I've been making playlists all day, I've cleaned out my car, my car is fixed (!!) and I'm about 30% ready to leave. I still have SO much to do. Lame errand-y things that all have to be done during the hours that I work. It'll work itself out. On a horrible side note, I can't find my camera ANYWHERE!

Drunk Saski.

Last night I went over to Andrew's house and he cooked me supper and poured me a hell of a strong drink and we watched UFC Fighting and I lost ten dollars on some fighter with a tramp stamp. I spilled rice on the couch and did shots of tequilla. Afterwards he gave me a ride to Matt's house where everyone watched a movie and we ate subs, but I wished I was eating more of the salmon Andrew cooked because it was surprisingly good, and I drank all of my root beer in one gulp. I melted oreos in my warm passed out hand and fell asleep on Matt's bed where upon the end of the movie I was so rudely awoken by my friends dragging my ass up out of bed and driving me home. I'm informed I fell down the stairs, but I don't remember that and I'm not sore, so everything is okay!

Can I just for a moment elaborate on the bachelor pad-ness of that house. Instead of a dining room table there is one of those miniature golf green's that you putt with in your office. Alongside that is the biggest sack of golf clubs I have ever seen. Let's move to the living room shall we? What would you expect other than leather furniture, a big screen t.v. and football memorabilia. The bathroom however was oddly feminine. There was potpourri and flowers. Bizarre.

Love Is In The Air.

Just friends:
he watches my gauze dress
blowing on the line.

-Alexis Rotella

Sleep-filled in My Hometown.

Last night I was supposed to go out, but I wasn't feeling great when I got home so I thought I would take a nap first. That was about 5:30 p.m. It is now 9:00 the next morning and I'm just waking up. I didn't even wake up once in that time. Sorry to anyone this affected, namely Aimee I guess.

I have so much crap to do today and no means to do it. My fucker fucking fucked-up fuck piece of a car is smoking profusely and smelling of maple syrup. I just took it in earlier this week and the NEXT DAY it started doing this shit. I'm phoning them today and giving them an earful. This happened last time too. Also, when you drop $200 to have your car tuned-up, you expect them to LOOK IT OVER. Damn hell.

I should have stayed in bed today.

Fucking Sponge Cake!

Not to be mistaken with fucking a sponge cake.

Apparently my defining feature is funny. I had several people today say, "Oh Amanda, you're so funny." Really? Am I really that guy? The funny guy.

I finally got the Jordan, Jesse Go! Mobisode (Webisode?) 2.0. I was falling out of my chair laughing at work. People kept going by giving me skeeved out looks because I hide my headphones in my hair. It looks like I'm just sitting there gasping for air.

I always have really good hair days, right before I go for a haircut. Today was no exception. My awesome hair was out in full force. I'm going for my hair cut at lunch tomorrow. Also, I bought new lenses for my glasses so I will be able to see on my awesome solo road trip to Calgary.

Well, I've got to go cut some cheese before I take the kids to the pool*. Catch you on the flip side.

*But not really.

Name That Tempo Tune-Up.

Have you ever had one of those feelings where you completely lack substance? I've been wondering about that lately. What is it that people actually like about me? I don't do anything interesting, I have THE most boring job on the planet, all in all I'm pretty plain. Don't think this is some big pity party or something. It's not. I've just been thinking about it. I watch a lot of television, but that doesn't make me interesting. It's the people who have created the t.v. I watch that are interesting.

I think I just need to create. Get my hands on some shit and work it. You know, take chances, make mistakes, get messy! Fuck, that woman knew what she was talking about.

On a completely unrelated note, I'm going to Calgary next week! Yay. I got the days off from work, tuned up the old tempo and I'm taking her out on the open road. I hope the weather holds out and the roads are awesome.

I've got some crazy busy days coming up. Aimee and I went to the library because they have free movies on Wednesday. Once was playing. That's actually what stemmed all of the substance talks. I want to be in love again. I want someone to look at me the way Glen Hansard was looking at Marketa Irglova. Tomorrow I'm going out my brother's for supper with the family. Friday we're going to see Library Voices, and if we have enough time we're going to check out Matthew's other band/Rah Rah. Saturday Andrew's cooking supper for me at his place... this should be interesting. Sunday will probably be trivia at the pub. Gong show. I hate having so much to do at once. I like everything to be more evenly spaced.

Skating club was out in full force today. I only fell once! Apparently I got a lot of air before I landed on my knee. Everyone seemed really concerned. Sadly, my mystery skating Romeo was nowhere to be seen.

Shaping Up. Shipping Out.

I've had Coffee Stain by Sarah Harmer on repeat all morning.

Yesterday I stayed up until two o'clock in the morning organizing my room. I realize that some would think it's lame to stay in on a Saturday to clean your room, but I loved it. Lately I've just been feeling so brought down by all my crap, so I decided to clear the air. I'm taking a butt load of stuff to Goodwill today.

Friday night was SO FUN! I went out for drinks with Aimee, Kristy, Fran and Julie. Fishbowls were had. Hearty laughs were had. The next morning when we woke up, Fran said her abs hurt from laughing so much. Anyway, we hit up BP's and then Julie gave us a ride over to O'Hanlon's. By that point I was two drinks and one fishbowl in. I was pleasantly tipsy, but thought I would stop drinking... but then we met up with Shannon. She was throwing down the Benjamin's like they were going out of style. She bought Aimee a drink which I ended up drinking, then she bought me a drink and then she bought shots of Jag.

Fran, Kristy and I were getting tired of the bar, so we left Aimee at the bar with Shannon and took a cab to the Kristy's house. The cab driver was hella racist and kept talking about turbans. He was sketchy, but also gave us some material for trivia team names. Not turban related names. When we got to Kristy's house she said, "Don't laugh out loud, but there's a huge Indian in my living room leftover from the Arizona theme." We stumbled down the stairs to the basement where we drank Pepsi, changed into Kristy's pyjamas, and played Trivial Pursuit til the wee hours of the morning.

This picture about sums up the night once we left the bar. Fran put on all of the leftover pyjamas. The socks that she's wearing were from her first host family in Germany. The woman who knitted them for her said, "I know you like art, so I knitted these for you."